Day one was a success. At least according to my standards. Not perfect, but a helluva lot better than usual. I know, I know, day one is always great because you are so enthused about your new beginnings. But progress is progress, large or small. I'm not going to list every morsel I put into my mouth on here, though I will say that I did incorporate fruit and vegetables into my menu and controlled my portions. I also did my thirty minutes of walking. I did not, however, limit myself to one diet soda. And I also had a cupcake. A fabulous coconut cupcake from the coffee shop where Mike works. And it was delicious. So, there it is. But you know what? For the first time I'm not going to focus on the imperfections and ignore all of the positive aspects of my day. There was a time when I would have eaten that cupcake and then said "screw it, I might as well eat what I want for the rest of the day and start again tomorrow". I'm not doing that. That way of thinking is why I'm fat. One cupcake should not ruin your whole day. I ate it and then for dinner I had a Lean Cuisine. End of story.
I also have a few more guidelines to add:
14) Avoid the cafeteria at work. I think that everyone can agree that free food provided where you work is pretty great. And generous. But here's the thing, at my job it is served buffet-style. There are hot choices, a salad bar, a soup, and deli meats & cheeses with rolls and bread. A buffet is not the best situation for me because of my portion control issue and because even if there are healthy options available, I will choose the unhealthy option while berating myself for the rest of the night after. And since I have an aversion to raw vegetables, the salad bar is lost on me. Better to just eat before I get to work or bring something along.
15) No eating after 10pm. My work hours are from 2-8pm and for the longest time I have let this dictate my eating schedule. I also like to sometimes cook and eat dinner with my boyfriend. Both result in eating a lot of late dinners. To be fair, I don't eat and go right to bed because I stay up late, but what I've been doing so far hasn't been working. Time for something new.
16) Eat when I'm physically hungry, not when I think I should. I don't know how many millions of times I've said or heard the phrase "it's lunch/dinner time, let's eat." And I would eat. Even if I wasn't really hungry. Because it was "time". Listening to your body is the way to go.
Making healthier choices isn't always going to be fun, but feeling bad about yourself because you're fat isn't fun either. I wish I was one of those girls who can say, "I'M FAT AND FABULOUS", but I'm not. I believe I'm now ready to do what needs to be done in order for me to regain my self-confidence.
I will go to bed tonight feeling good about my day. I will also probably go to bed feeling hungry.