Sunday, July 8, 2012

Still Beautiful (Life)

I've let quite a bit of time pass since my last post. And it's not because I've been so busy leading a fun and fabulous life. In fact, I haven't written because there ain't been much of anything happenin'. Nothing worth writing about, anyway. I'm still plugging away at WW, and I go to work, doing a job that I almost hate, but sometimes enjoy. I've just been going through daily life and thinking that there has to be a better way. There has to be something else out there for me. Especially career-wise. Although I feel very fortunate to have a source of income when so many other people are struggling, the reason that I almost hate my job is that after 8 years of doing massage, it hurts. I'm developing tendonitis in my elbow. I sometimes have pain in my wrist and thumb.....my neck and shoulder....oh, and my low back. After a busy shift, when I arrive home and sit down, I am often unable to get back up without a struggle. It's unpleasant, it makes me not want to work, and I don't know how much longer I can do it as a full time job. On the flip side, there are those lovely moments when you have the right connection with your client and they love your work, making you feel very appreciated. Those times are what keep me going in the profession, but ideally I'd like to do it part time. So, I'm looking to start my next career phase. Whatever it may be. The only thing I'm sure of is that it will somehow involve promoting the City of New Orleans, because this city is my heart and my passion. I've accepted the fact that I will pretty much have to work until I die, so it might as well be doing something fun that I love. I don't know what that something is yet, but I am confident that it will be. To that end, I signed up for a tour guiding class at the community college. Not sure what I will do with the license yet, but it's a start. I AM sure that I love giving people suggestions on where to visit, music to hear, and food to eat in the city. I love planning itineraries. I love taking pictures. I love writing. I want to have a part in showing New Orleans to people and making them love my city as I do. Too many times I've seen or heard of people coming here, walking up and down Bourbon St. and leaving thinking that they've seen New Orleans. This is just sad and inaccurate. I want to remedy this. So, I'll research my options and see what I can make happen. We should all be able to enjoy what we spend a large portion of our life doing.

I mentioned WW.......all is well on this front. Still slow going and I definitely haven't been perfect but I'm down around 23 lbs. and that's better than where I started. I'm sure that if I added some exercise the weight would come off much faster, but the chances of that happening in the NOLA heat and humidity are slim. And I'm not joining a gym because I won't go and, to quote my cousin Wayne, "The only number that will go down is the one in my checkbook." But I will stick with the WW because it's making me start to feel good about myself again. This is the longest I've EVER stuck with WW or any type of diet modification and that gives me hope and confidence. The reality is that I'm not on a "diet" that I can go off of when I reach a weight that I'm comfortable with. This is for life. And that can be a bit overwhelming when you think about it. But the longer I stay with it, the more comfortable I am doing it. I also have a great support system in my "WW buddy", Karen; the gals in the support group I started on facebook; my mom and my aunt Renee who always cheer me on in my triumphs; and my boyfriend, who doesn't see me as fat (a bit of denial there) and has made an effort to learn healthier ways of cooking. Outside support is so very important and I'm grateful for all that I have.

Moving on.....I haven't been doing much socializing or participating in the ongoing revelry of N.O. Truthfully, since April I think I've had one cocktail (at Tujague's after a French Quarter tour for class). Cocktails usually put the kibosh on my weight loss efforts (high calories/low inhibitions). There were a couple of times that I really had to restrain myself from partaking but, overall, I'd say I'm doing pretty well. There's also the money factor. Just don't have extra for fun right now. But I do see a light at the end of the tunnel and an improved financial situation is ahead. Also ahead is the Satchmo Summer Fest, and I won't miss that. Always a nice time. And I've even been able to, through the generosity of my mom and my daddy up in heaven, book a room at the Lamothe House downtown for a little "staycation". (Spending money is another thing, but we'll do it on the cheap and figure something out.) It is amazing to me how having a few days in a hotel with a pool to look forward to can boost your spirits and motivate you through your day. I'm grateful for this also.

On a sad note, I have to report here that "Uncle" Lionel Batiste has passed on at the age of 81. Long time bass drummer for the Treme Brass Band, dapper gentleman, and all around New Orleans LEGEND. This man lived his life to the fullest with unmatched exuberance and is an example of doing what you love for a living. For Uncle Lionel, age was definitely just a number. He made his rounds every night. Singing, dancing, and charming many ladies of all ages while doing so. He is a role model and we should all take a page from his book and live every day like it's our last. Because even though I may be fat, not love my job, and money might be tight so I have to eat a few peanut butter & jelly sammiches for dinner......life is still beautiful and there's always a silver lining.